This is the hand soap I use.

I have used it 4 times today. Thank you for asking.

No, my name is not Monk. No thank you for asking, you jerk.

Anyways, the reason I pointed out this soap is because today I want to call into question how ethical it is to make this soap.

How ethical is it to make this soap? Not very. Know why? Because this soap is an unethical form of training, similar to teaching toddlers karate. Why do I say this?

Imagine that you are a part of a huge family. Then, one day, a bad bad man introduces a poisonous substance into your home, killing 99.9% of your family. You barely escape with your life. In fact, the only reason you escaped was because you were the only one who built up a resistance to this poison over time. Sure, you’ve grown stronger, but at what cost? You’ve lost your family. An absolute travesty. I mean tragedy.

I understand that scientists and soap makers nowadays want to do their part in making germs stronger. I’m all for that. But why can’t we use a method that’s slightly less cruel? We could build little germ gymnasiums or something.

The fact that people make this hellish exercise program for germs is bad enough. But what shocks and dismays me more is PETA’s silence on the matter.

What’s the matter, PETA? Are germs not good enough for you? Are they too small to be noticed by you?

That’s why I’ve decided to start a civil right’s movement among the animal world. Bacteria have been discriminated against for far too long. Actually, I’m too busy to start the movement myself. I think I’ll have to delegate it to someone else.

Any volunteers?

Last 5 posts by Jason Matthews

• Microsoft Zune Product Review by Me: A Zune Customer, Consumer, and User - September 15th, 2008
• Snuggle - August 22nd, 2008
• Bose Headphones Review - August 22nd, 2008
• Oh yeah, I almost forgot. - August 21st, 2008
• My Friend Philips - August 21st, 2008